How to Tell Your Partner You Don’t like Their Idea of Romance

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Candlelight dinners, long walks on the beach, watching the sunset together, paired with the essential red roses. These are all the staples of romantic dates. Most of you would have been on dates like this, or have planned dates like these for your partners. If you enjoyed these kind of dates, then good for you! Your partner’s efforts paid off. But what if you detest the cliché ideas of romance; of red roses and diamond rings and sunsets at the beach? It is hard, to break it to your partner that what they like romantically isn’t doing a thing for you. The situation may be reversed: you like roses and sunsets, but your partner’s idea of a romantic night is sitting at home in their underwear while watching Criminal Minds. How do you let your significant other know that you don’t like their idea of romance? We have a few tips.

Tell Them about It

A healthy relationship needs honesty
A healthy relationship needs honesty
This seems really obvious, but you’ll be surprised. Many of you wouldn’t want to confront your partner over something like this, believing that it may lead to hurt feelings. You may feel that it would be better for your relationship if you’d just bear with it silently. That is not true; a healthy relationship needs honesty to work. If you are not even comfortable enough to tell your partner you don’t enjoy their idea of romance, how will the both of you even discuss weightier topics like bank account balances and children?

In addition, discussing romance is not as frivolous as some of you may think. To keep your relationship strong in the future, you and your partner need to go on regular dates to keep the flame alive. If your ideas of romance are incompatible, you end up with one partner feeling the love and the other feeling left out in the cold. The worst thing is, your partner won’t even know that you dislike all the dates he or she plans. Thus it is best for you to clear the air as soon as possible regarding this.

Try to Compromise

You have to adjust your expectations
You have to adjust your expectations
Another important thing you should do is compromise. You may detest everything about red roses and slow dancing in the rain, but if your partner loves them, there is no need to air your views about how pointless you find these things. Trust us, if you have talked to your partner about your views towards romance, they will remember what you’ve said. There is no need to rain on their parade.

Just think about it, you may hate traditional ways of showing romance, but you love your partner don’t you? Think about how happy it will make your partner if you do something he or she likes. They’ll certainly appreciate it, especially if they know how out-of-character it is for you to do something like this. Of course, this goes both ways. If you adore long romantic walks and diamond rings while your partner prefers Netflix and pizza, you have to adjust your expectations a little. For instance, spend time with them cuddling on the couch while watching TV instead of going out for a date. They’ll appreciate you spending time with them doing something they like, instead of complaining how “going out would be much more romantic.”